Still Becoming

I have always been a baseball mom. Baseball makes sense to me. There are innings. There are bases. There is a pitcher. There is a batter. People take turns doing things. There are moments of excitement, but there are also long stretches where everyone appears to be standing around thinking about life. Comfortable, predictable, safe-ish.…

Read more

There are many things nobody tells you about divorce. How quiet the house becomes. How strange it feels to fill out a form and check divorced. How you will suddenly need to learn things your spouse always handled. And how, approximately eleven seconds after people discover you are single, every unattached man you’ve encountered since…

Read more

I wrote this in what feels like another lifetime, but it deserves a space here. For a long time, I thought this story was about you. I studied you like an answer key. Your face. Your body. Your age. The things you liked. The things that made you different from me. There had to be…

Read more

There are days that don’t look like much on paper. No reservations. No flights booked. No beautiful itinerary tucked neatly into a travel app. No grand plan. Just a Sunday. An eighteen-degree fall day beside the river, where the trees look less like trees and more like some curated museum exhibit, every shade of amber,…

Read more

And other lies I tell myself before 9 am. Every night, somewhere around 10 p.m., I become deeply optimistic about the woman I will be tomorrow. Tomorrow Tina is fucking incredible. She wakes up early, she drinks water before coffee, she takes her vitamins without finding them still sitting beside the coffee maker six hours…

Read more

Somewhere between what was, what is and what comes next There is a particular kind of grief that comes from mourning a life that never actually happened. Not a person. Not a place. Not even a single moment you can point to and say, there, that’s where I lost it. It’s the life you were…

Read more